Kid Doctors

Another note on my Holiday at Cedars Sinai

Also known as interns, residents, fellows or as they like to introduce themselves, just generally as “part of the thoracic team”. Don’t trust them, or any other “doctor like” person who is not your doctor. They really don’t know what’s going on. Sure they glanced at your chart for a full 4 seconds before sauntering into your room – but just listen, nod your head, and ignore what they say.

I had some kid about my age walk into my room shortly after I arriving in my room from the recovery room. He didn’t give a title but muttered something about being on the “thoracic team”. I assume he was some kind of soon-to-be-full-on-doctor. He asked me if I wanted to go home. Dumb boy, my reply – “sure, spring me”. He told me I could go as soon as I could walk, eat, and take oral pain meds. “Bring it on” was my higher-than-a-kite response. Come to find out when I asked for a meal and to have the tube in my chest and IV taken out – kid doctor was wrong and I was held captive for a few more days.

Another kid doctor was seeing me before I went into surgery. He requested to write a “yes” on the side of my chest that the surgery was to take place on and a “no” on the other side. Kinda scary that surgeons rely on kids with magic markers for surgical instruction, but I thought, hey what's the harm. Well the harm was that kid doctor didn’t believe me when I told him they weren’t going through the front of my chest, but through the back. Trying to explain to trust-me-I’m-almost-a-real-doctor kid that your chest can be accessed from the front and back isn’t as easy as it sounds. We compromised and he wrote on both the front and back of my chest on the respected sides “yes” and “no”. I think he was happy – he got to do more coloring and I let him pick the colors. I was happy just to see a big fat scar running through the “yes” on my back and not on my front.